Weekly Fortunes January 24th - 30th

CAPRICORN
As the first month of the new year comes to a close, visualize where you'd like to be this time next year. This is the time to plant the seeds that will make it happen. If you have insomnia try watching La Dolce Vita before bed.

AQUARIUS
You can only control yourself. Attempts to control others will fail. Consider donating money to a worthy cause. Avoid foods that come out of a can.

PISCES
Don't judge others. What they are doing isn't any worse than what your other friends are doing and it just bothers you for personal reasons. Rise above. Be the bigger person.

ARIES
Silence the voices in your head. If that isn't possible you should go to a doctor. You love to call others crazy but you are the one responsible for the drama in your life right now. Don't wear stripes this week. If you violate laws you'll get caught.

TAURUS
Watch PBS more this week. Make travel plans. Clean out your pantry and donate extra food.

GEMINI
See the film New York Stories. You can learn from those three tales this week. Throw yourself a party of some kind. Listen to piano music.

CANCER
Buy a new plant for your house. A jade plant or an orchid would be nice. If that isn't in the budget paint or draw something green.

LEO
Get inspired. Help others to move forward. Revamp the entry way to your home.

VIRGO
Beauty is as beauty does. Indulge in elaborate beauty rituals at home. Don't pay for services you can do yourself at home: do your own nails, give yourself a facial etc.

LIBRA
The opposite of love is indifference. If you have a burning hatred for someone they have power over you. Revenge is for losers. Happiness truly is the best revenge. Research the band PANSY DIVISION.

SCORPIO
Dust and polish all the corners of your home and the places no one sees like on the top of ceiling fan, under radiators, on the top of the fridge etc. Housework is great for your figure. Wear something yellow twice this week.

SAGITTARIUS
Ask yourself how you would like to be treated and treat others the same. Go see a play this week. Support small community theatre. Eat grapefruit or blueberries and cream.

Weekend Tarot January 22 - 24

CAPRICORN
card: THE LOVERS (reversed)
Look out for temptation this weekend to take the easy but shady route this weekend. Do your own work. You might not see all the pitfalls of the easy shady route, but they are there.

AQUARIUS
card: FIVE OF SWORDS (reversed)
Stop pretending. Admit mistakes. Move on to better days.

PISCES
card: THREE OF CUPS
This card indicates the birth of something you hold dear. This card also indicates a party.

ARIES
card: THE HANGED MAN (reversed)
Why are you refusing to examine your motives? Are you afraid you'll have to change? Get yourself out of purgatory.

TAURUS
card: NINE OF CUPS (reversed)
Don't be vain. Be prepared to wait. It is true that good things come in time.

GEMINI
card: PAGE OF SWORDS (reversed)
Stay away from gossips this weekend. Someone might be trying to swindle you. Use your best judgement.

CANCER
card: NINE OF WANDS (reversed)
You might be stressed this weekend. Do activities that relax you instead of adding to your stress.

LEO
card: KNIGHT OF WANDS (reversed)
Someone you thought was sincere isn't. Be careful. Don't let anyone lead you on. Actions mean far more than words in intimate relationships.

VIRGO
card: EIGHT OF SWORDS (reversed)
Don't lose your head! Use your logic to handle conflict not your emotions.

LIBRA
card: SIX OF PENTACLES
Be generous with advice. You might get some unexpected money this weekend. Enjoy it!

SCORPIO
card: THE SUN
You will feel much delight at life. Your health will be good and you will feel mentally secure. A haven is at hand.

SAGITTARIUS
card: QUEEN OF WANDS
This card represents a giving and friendly woman. It could be someone you know or a part of yourself.

Weekly Fortunes January 18th - 24th

CAPRICORN
"... and all my armor's fallin down at a pile at my feet.." - Fiona Apple
Some of your defenses will fall away this week making you feel naked, but that is a good thing. Many of these defenses you wear to cover your insecurities. Get the confidence to be comfortable in your birthday suit.

AQUARIUS
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us have our eyes on the stars" - Oscar Wilde
Keep your head up this week Aquarius. With your eyes on the sky you might trip over some cracks in the sidewalk but it won't matter when you get where you are going!

PISCES
"I want to be in that number baby when the saints go marchin in.." - Louis Armstrong
Do the right thing this week. Rise above petty squabbles and put you energy into gettin in that number you crave so much.

ARIES
"If you sleep with dogs you will wake up with fleas." - Benjamin Franklin
Stay away from shady schemes and shay people this week - and certainly keep them out of your bed.

TAURUS
"... and the painted ponies go up and down.. we're captive on the carousel of time" - Joni Mitchel
The cyclical nature of life is a blessing. Pick your pony. Enjoy the ride this week.

GEMINI
"Every morning I wake up and ask myself should I live another day or blast myself?" - Tupac
Grab your life by the balls this week Gemini. Every day involves choices. Choose to live your life to the fullest.

CANCER
"Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind." - Shakespeare
They say you should never look a gift horse in the mouth, but this week you should look gift horses in the mouth, in the booty, in the eye and everywhere else because the reality is someone might have ulterior motives for giving you gifts. They won't admit this to you or even to themselves but you have to realize that many people will lord things they give you over you.

LEO
"My girl my girl don't lie to me, tell me where did you sleep last night?" - Kurt Cobain
Don't get involved with someone who is already involved with someone else. And if you are the one two timin... stop.

VIRGO
"Be kind to me or treat me mean, I'll make the most of it I'm an extraordinary machine." - Fiona Apple
Don't let circumstances intimidate you this week. You are scrappy and as long as you don't do anything stupid or shady you will prevail.

LIBRA
"I once loved a woman a child I am told don't think twice it's alright." - Bob Dylan
Don't give past disappointment a second thought this week.

SCORPIO
"Go dj, that's my dj!" - Lil Wayne
Create a soundtrack for this moment in your life. Make a mix tape or cd for winter 2010. In 10 years you can remember when...

SAGITTARIUS
"Hell is other people." - Jean Paul Sartre
Keep to yourself this week. If you enjoy spending time with yourself, others will love spending time with you too. Chances are they already do but make them miss you.

Weekend Tarot January 15th-17th

CAPRICORN
card: THE DEVIL
This card implies a struggle between the angel on your right and the little devil on your left, but there is nothing to fear because the choice is up to you. This card also suggests that you are a bit trapped into something: a relationship, career or other commitment. Trust your gut. Do what you gotta do to stay true to your authentic self.

AQUARIUS
card: FIVE OF CUPS
You will feel the sorrow of a romantic break this weekend. Just remember Edith Piaf and have no regrets. Focus on what you have that is whole and don't focus on the broken aspects of relationships.

PISCES
card:THE LOVERS
Pick a flower. He loves me... he loves me not... she loves me... she loves me not... he loves me.. she loves me... This card represents commitment in an important choice. Existing conflicts will be resolved. Listen to your heart in this case. Grow.

ARIES
card:KNIGHT OF PENTACLES
You will achieve steady progress this weekend.

TAURUS
card: TWO OF SWORDS (reversed)
Dig deeper. Someone might be trying to deceive you.

GEMINI
card: PAGE OF CUPS
You will be lead by your emotions this weekend. Temper your emotions with maturity and reassurance.

CANCER
card: QUEEN OF CUPS
Pay close attention to your dreams this weekend. Some dreams are more symbolic, while others are more literal. Use your intuition to decide what is symbolic and what is literal.

LEO
card: FOUR OF CUPS
Some boredom in a relationship may start to fester a little. Do something to rekindle the fire and keep this boredom at bay. All relationships and situations go through stagnant periods. You can overcome it.

VIRGO
card: EIGHT OF CUPS
This weekend you may just experience a great change in your direction. This might be uncomfortable at first but it will be better in the long term.

LIBRA
card: ACE OF CUPS
Explore your ultra girly side this weekend. Pursue your artistic endeavors. Give birth to something utterly original.

SCORPIO
card: EIGHT OF SWORDS
Ask for help. Don't panic. Learn from mistakes.

SAGITTARIUS
card: NINE OF CUPS
Get happy about meeting new people this weekend. You will feel healthy and it is possible one of the wishes you make on a star will come true.


NOTE TO ALL:
I couldn't believe my eyes when I was drawing cards this morning how many times the suit of cups came up! My cards are very well shuffled and cups cards just kept appearing. So I think that indicates that the suit of cups will be the mood this weekend for all of us. Cups are symbolic of EMOTIONS, LOVE, CREATIVITY and ABUNDANCE.

Weekly Fortunes January 10th - 16th

CAPRICORN
Start investing in local artists this week. It doesn't have to take a lot of dough. Think HERB AND DOROTHY Vogel. Do you feel like the sad clown sometimes? Don't worry too much about it. We all have pain and the weak wear it like a badge, like they are the only people with problems. It takes a strong person to smile through it. You are stronger than you think! Mohammed Ali was a Capricorn.


AQUARIUS
Stop worrying about what you think you want. Forget want altogether this week. Open yourself up to what you need. It might be the same as what you need or it might not. For example some people might want to do heroin or something but what they NEED is a sliced apple with peanut butter.


PISCES
Sincere intentions are fine but they add up to a big nothing without action. Action is key this week. Have the balls to follow through on your convictions. Make homemade strawberry shortcake. If you were a rapper, what would your stage name be?
Try to summon the confidence that most rappers have. Believe that you are the best at what you do and back it up. Hustle hard to make your dreams real.


ARIES
Stop lying to yourself. Stop fronting to others. No one is buying it and no one ever will. Sure you might fool someone for a few minutes but eventually what you really are comes forth. You might as well just take off your mask. People who don't like who you really are aren't worth your rapidly evaporating time anyway.


TAURUS
Have you considered going platinum blonde? Remember that socks don't have to match to keep your feet warm. Cozy up to someone who doesn't match your usual friends. Don't boss love around too much this week or you might just get fired.


GEMINI
Get physical this week. You don't have to pick a side. People who try to get you to feel insecure are full of crap. You are under no obligation to be consistent. Embrace your contradictions.


CANCER
If someone really loves you they will love you in spite of you metaphorical frozen nosehairs. In fact your imperfections will be a turn on. What far off destination would you like to spend New Year's Eve 2011? Start saving now and make it happen.


LEO
If you must bite your tongue in a certain situation, at least keep a journal where you can vent. Clean out your fridge and pantry. Get rid of old underwear and socks. Discard relationships that no longer fit you and leave your feet cold and your bum bare.


VIRGO
If you have been shady for awhile now and thought you were getting away with it know this: no one gets away with anything. Eventually the gig will be up. If you have been "good" than reward yourself with food sex. If you aren't into that learn the art of reading tea leaves.


LIBRA
Get a life. Get up. Get out there and get it. You deserve to be happy. Realize that no one can make you unhappy. If you are unhappy blame yourself. We are all responsible for our own happiness. Whatever happened was as much your fault as theirs. Move on. Discover what thrills you to pieces. If you think that nothing thrills you, kill yourself. Just kidding dear Libra! If you aren't sure what really takes an axe to the frozen pound cake inside you, start volunteering. Helping others will help you.


SCORPIO
Channel Marie Laveaux to get the lovin you crave this week. Put a spell on them, one way or another!


SAGITTARIUS
"Fox in the snow where can you go to find something you can eat? The word out on the street is that your starvin... Listen to your crazy laugh..." You think you are approaching the end of something but the adventure is only just started. Hop on the streetcar. You know the one: DESIRE.

Weekend Tarot

CAPRICORN
card: TWO OF CUPS
This card predicts a love commitment. So, if you are looking for that get all dolled up and get ready for satisfaction. This card can also mean a meeting of kindred souls in a great friendship. Go to coffee, drink some wine, pick your poison and drink up!


AQUARIUS
card: ACE OF CUPS
Get ready for emotional expression. Motherhood is one meaning of this card. It also can signify fallin in love. A third meaning for this card is creativity. I also think any card from the suit of cups beckons: DRINK SOMETHING!


PISCES
card: ACE OF PENTACLES
Cha-ching! This card represents the material success and a taste of the sweet life. If you have entered any contests this card could mean that you will win. You might want to play the lottery or at least spin the bottle.


ARIES
card: SEVEN OF SWORDS (reversed)
This card in this position means you might give up on something too soon. Take heart and be brave. This card also can signify crime so when you go out bring your mace.


TAURUS
card: SEVEN OF PENTACLES
This card means you are sooooooo close to getting what you want. Continue your efforts!


GEMINI
card: THE DEVIL (reversed)
The Devil card in this position indicates that you might have a tendency to follow your head instead of your heart this weekend. Ignore the haters and naysayers and do the right thing. In the end it doesn't matter at all what others think of you. What matters is that you can live with your choices.


CANCER
card: THREE OF SWORDS
This cards indicates you might suffer a heart break this weekend. Heart breaks happen, no one is immune. Just remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea and the right person will cross your path soon enough. Pamper yourself.


LEO
card: QUEEN OF CUPS
Cook a feast or treat someone to brunch this weekend. Pay careful attention to your dreams. This might be a good time to start a dream journal. Fellini made a quick sketch of some aspect of his dreams every morning. Consider this.


VIRGO
card: STRENGTH (reversed)
Confrontation is the key to pushing through an issue this weekend. Don't hide you skeletons in the closet; dance with them!


LIBRA
card: KING OF WANDS
Be a shoulder to cry on and a giver of advice this weekend. Don't let a friend do something stupid. Be generous and show compassion. Walk in their shoes. Watch the film CROOKLYN.


SCORPIO
card: THE HIGH PRIESTESS
Follow your inner voice. Ask for advice from someone you admire. Sit in the sun but don't stare it down.


SAGITTARIUS
card: THE STAR
A beautiful card for a beautiful weekend. Stop and smell the cupcakes. Shine!

Weekly Fortunes January 3 - 9

CAPRICORN
Balance work with play. Push yourself in new directions. Keep moving forward. Paint something (nails, walls, canvas).

AQUARIUS
Avoid over priced mass produced designer crap. Seek knowledge and you will never be bored. Eat oysters.

PISCES
Steam an artichoke and focus on each leaf as you eat it; let the rest of the world fall away. Just you and the artichoke.

ARIES
You are as lucky as you feel. You have more control over your "luck" than you think.

TAURUS
Research Princess Mathilde. Kick back and watch Tyra at least once this week.

GEMINI
Remember that you are responsible for the quality of your pet's life. And your own!

CANCER
Play with contrasts this week. Go to a sauna and then bury your face in the snow for a minute. If you don't have snow, ice.

LEO
Think of where you'd like to be this time next year. Plant the seeds of your future.

VIRGO
Buy yourself some flowers. Don't compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to yourself.

LIBRA
Don't be a slave to your obsessions. Learn to let go. Fly a kite this week.

SCORPIO
Consider wearing more purple. This week if you seek you will find.

SAGITTARIUS
Listen to Arvo Part. Don't make fun of others. Make fresh juice.