Tuesday, January 4, 2011

2011 New Year Horoscopes

Better Late than never... that is a good adage for 2011. Better to fall in love late than never to fall in love. Better to be good to your body late than never. Better to end harmful addictions and harmful relationships late than never. Better to tell the truth late than to tell lies to yourself or others forever. Better to keep in touch with loved ones late than never. Better to donate to your favorite charity and get rid of all the crap cluttering up your life late than never. Better to stop judging and blaming others now than never. That doesn't mean to procrastinate. Better to let go of negativity now than never. That means NOW is the time and now is all we have: 2011. Do it now, it's later than we think.

You can think you are superior but that doesn't mean it is true. You can think you know things about someone else but that doesn't mean that you really do. We all fall prey to thinking things about ourselves and others that aren't really true. You might think something you want to go well will go wrong - but that doesn't mean that things will actually go wrong. Don't worry so much! Don't worry about what your neighbor is doing - just be happy and know you are lucky to be you!

The flame is burning and it is lit now by you. The intention was right and true. Summon from within the courage to see it through.

Revamp your relationships. Reduce the amount of time you spend gossiping. This year will be a steady climb to zen for you. Give yourself a crash course in being fabulously you. Retain only the essential.

Hearts on fire: the world's most perfect love starts with you. This year surround yourself with smells and tastes that you love. Rub a bit of Mexican vanilla extract on your wrist and smell it throughout the day. Heavenly bodies will heal you this year. Avoid your tendency toward priggishness. Make a list of 101 odd things about you. The stranger the better. Channel your inner Diane Arbus, but turn the lens away from others and focus on the beautiful freak in you.

Kissing twins live inside you -- the only trouble is sometimes they rip eachother's hair out. You may feel on the edge of the world just now but I promise you won't drift off into anti-gravity. Remember that computers can't feel. When it comes to love keep interactions real. Make sure to pay attention to the emotional feedback your lover gives you. Pay attention to the unseen, the unsaid, the MOOD.

This year you will tap into an infinite inspiration. This will exhilarate you to the point of orgiastic spurts of expression. This is the year you get your groove back. This is the year you will finally learn to give yourself head. Just kidding!!! But seriously you will learn how to be more self-reliant when it comes to entertaining yourself. You'll learn that just spending time alone and creating from you new well of original creativity will be better than any party.

Many people never thought you could do it. In fact at times, neither did you. But indeed you shall. And this isn't about love or other people. This is about real accomplishment.

Oh virgins, you seem so innocent to many out there, but I know you better than that! Let your freak flag fly Virgo. I know that is hard for you. If you had a 11th toe that you chopped off in the morning and it grew back at night, you'd wake up before the rest of the world and chop it right off before anyone else even knew. But the problem is there'd still be a bit of blood on your little white bobby socks - so observant people would have a little clue about the freak in you, so all that pain an worry about trying to hide that extra toe would be for naught. Everything comes out eventually and it is better to embrace the strange in you.

Will this be the year the sunshine comes back into your life? You'll have to move that crap out of the window first if you want to let some real fresh light in. I promise if you do the nether-regions of your heart will be warmed.

Home, sweet, home... this is the year you make your little room a soft place to fall.